What if? What if? Have you ever dealt with the what-ifs? Entertaining the what-ifs in your life is the first step to being overtaken with worry. Worry is taking responsibility for things you were never intended to handle. Worry is a lack of trust in the Creator of the universe. Worry says that you can handle it when many times you simply cannot. Are you worried that you worry too much? You don’t defeat worry by worrying about it. You defeat worry by redirecting your concerns to Someone who can actually do something about your situation. It does not mean that you do not take responsibility for the things you are supposed to handle; it just means that you know when you stop and God begins. Worried you don’t know enough about it? Check out what the Bible says! 
Tag: life
5 issues to be addressed in Premarital Counseling
Planning your wedding is stressful enough, but it’s a piece of buttercream-frosted cake compared to the day-to-day reality of actual marriage.
Indeed, so often couples get caught up with everything involved in prepping for their Big Day and romanticizing the concept of marriage that they forget to (or don’t realize that they should) address all of the less-romantic issues that will inevitably arise when two people commit to sharing their lives together.
Premarital counseling is an excellent way to confront these issues upfront and establish a stronger, healthier relationship moving into matrimony.
1. Money
Finances are a common cause of contention between those about to be married.
2. Time
Time can also be a big problem in a relationship. One may feel neglected if their partner is often away at work, school or other functions. Conversely, a partner may value their space and wish they could spend more time alone.
3. In-Laws
When you marry someone, you’re not just marrying them – you’re essentially marrying their family as well. It’s important for you to learn how to get along with the whole family, especially if at this point you’re already on shaky ground. It’s also helpful to establish what sort of boundaries as a couple you will put in place. Some family members may be in the habit of just dropping by for a visit. This may upset your new partner. Also, it would be helpful to discuss how you plan to spend time with both sets of in-laws during holidays.
4. Resolving conflict
All couples disagree sometimes. What’s less important than the frequency of conflict (though frequent fighting is a serious issue that must be addressed, of course) is how a couple reacts to said engagements.
5. Religion
Again, now is not the time to sweep lingering issues under the rug. Statistically, couples that share the same faith (or lack thereof) are more likely to stay together than those that don’t. If your partner is of a different faith, you need to decide whether this is something that will bother you long-term or not. This can be a critical issue.
Be sure to discuss these critical issues during premarital counseling. Ultimately, it all comes down to honesty and respect.
If you’re able to be honest with your partner and respect their traits and beliefs even when you don’t like or agree with them, and if your partner can do the same, then the future of your marriage looks bright.
5 tips on fighting fair with your teen
5 tips on fighting fair with your teen
Fights with your moody teenagers are inevitable, but here are a few things to remember when a battle breaks out.
- Teenagers can be terrors, and battles are bound to break out. But not every argument has to be a free-for-all fight. It may seem fitting to make sure your little one knows who’s boss in your home, but it’s important to remember that your kids are still growing, and how you handle arguments with them will teach them how to handle arguments with others. You are a model for your son’s behavior, and you’re teaching your daughter what to expect from the world. So when frustrations rise and tensions boil over, remember this important advice about fights:
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1. Words hurt, and cannot be taken back
You can’t un-ring a bell; and you can’t take back hurtful words you say to your child. You may instantly forget what is spewed in a fray, but the worse it was, the longer your child will remember. No matter how bad the conflict seems, your son or daughter needs to know you’ll still be there for him or her once the battle is over and the smoke has cleared. That bond and trust can easily be broken when he or she has to forget something terrible you’ve said to rebuild your relationship.
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2. Your child will remember things you forget
It’s not just words you must be careful of in fights; your actions can also speak loudly. Acting aggressively toward your son or daughter – lunging, chasing, grabbing or raising a fist – is unnecessary. And needless to say, making contact in this manner is entirely inappropriate. If your teen loses control and attacks you, your job is to restrain and de-escalate — never to retaliate. Likewise, leaving your child in a fight, either at home or stranded somewhere, will leave him feeling abandoned. Be present and available, even in conflict. And see your fight through until its resolution.
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3. You are the adult, and you are in control
Not of your son, but of yourself. He is growing into an independent person with a mind of his own, and no amount of punishment, rage or belittling is going to turn him into who or what you want him to be. He has to find that for himself. But the best way to encourage this is to show him how to be someone you would want him to be; especially in times of crisis.
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4. You are a role model
How you respond in times of stress says a lot about you and your parenting. Show your child how a mature adult responds to the world when things are not going your way. You may feel justified in blowing up and getting into a shouting match, but nothing gets heard or resolved over yelling. Make change at indoor volume.
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5. Yours is not the only valid opinion
It may be time to sit back and actually listen to your teen’s point of view. Yes he may lie, and yes she may be manipulative, but somewhere deep down your teens are learning to navigate the world, and there is likely some structured and logical thinking. Acknowledge what actually makes sense, and build on that.
Fights with your teens can be stepping stones into adulthood, so make sure you’re laying a good foundation. Teach your sons and daughters to resolve conflict and face an argument with good skills and goals so everyone comes out unscathed and no worse for wear.
One year ago
One year ago, today I was feeling miserable not knowing what was wrong with me. Everything I ate, I wanted to put back out or it felt like it was stuck in my throat. I ended up like that laying on a hospital bed awaiting my doctors to begin my surgery. I was feeling miserable. I had been at that hospital for about 2 1/2 weeks just doing all kinds of tests till they finally found out what was wrong with me and decided to operate.
Turned out I had what it’s called ” Achalasia of the esophagus” and what is that? You might be asking. That was the same question I was asking all the doctors there. ” What the heck is that?” As they started to explain to me what it was.
Achalasia is a rare disease of the muscle of the esophagus (swallowing tube). The term achalasia means “failure to relax” and refers to the inability of the lower esophageal sphincter (a ring of muscle situated between the lower esophagus and the stomach) to open and let food pass into the stomach.
What can cause the esophagus to close?
A thin area of narrowing in the lower esophagus can intermittently cause difficulty swallowing solid foods. Gastroesophageal reflux disease (GERD). Damage to esophageal tissues from stomach acid backing up into your esophagus can lead to spasm or scarring and narrowing of your lower esophagus. Eosinophilic esophagitis.
What is the surgery for achalasia?
The most common surgical technique used to treat achalasia is called the Heller myotomy, in which the surgeon cuts the muscles at the end of the esophagus and at the top of the stomach. In the past, this surgery was performed through a large (open) incision in the chest or abdomen.
I didn’t think twice and said go ahead do it. All I knew was I was tired of living the way I was. I couldn’t handle it anymore. So off I went to surgery.
With all the support from my husband by my side, I was very confident I would survive another surgery, another battle, another obstacle in my life.
Not only him, but my boys too. My family has been my Rock. My everything in time of need.
I wouldn’t be able to go on without their help. I’m forever grateful.
After my surgery when I thought things would finally be better and my life would turn around. I became depressed. Didn’t want to leave my room. My life was from my downstairs to my upstairs. I didn’t want to do anything. Not because of the way my life was or my family. I love my life and my family. But my sickness just kept on coming and never went away. This surgery was to make me feel better and nothing changed. I was angry. Angry at the doctors, at a lot of things.
Then I decided to turn things around. I sought help (professional)
Today I’m still very sick as far as my Achalasia, blood clotting disorder, Fibromyalgia,etc..etc..
In between this one year, I changed my mind about being miserable and decided to live my life.
Regardless of how I feel, I will still live on. when I don’t want to get up, or do anything, I will still do it. Just because I need to do so.
I put my faith and hope in the Lord the only one who can give me my daily strength.
I’m not 100% but I try every day to do better than I did yesterday. With God’s help I’ll slowly get to a point where I can at least cut down on medications. 🙂
Praying for a better tomorrow.
Thank you for reading.
How to coupon like a Boss
It’s been a while since I’ve been here. Not because I didn’t want to blog but because I haven’t had the time.
I’ve been sick, had a few visits to the ER and to my PC and it’s a pain when you are so busy and have to keep up with social media.
Sometimes I just need that space and time apart. I apologize to the followers, Friends, and family that comes here to read what I blog. It’s frustrating not having an updated blog. My sincere apologies.
The other reason is that my oldest son graduated high school and we had a party 🙂
What a Stress 😮 planning and organizing a party is so much stress.
My middle child graduates next year I promised I’m already planning and starting to buy things now hahhaha.
Plus every other mother/wife duty
In this post, I wanted to share some of my couponing with you guys.
I’m only a beginner and I’m just learning. Please keep this in mind. 🙂
When you’re a stay home mom and your husband is the only one working, you need to make due whatever way you can to help out.
I found out about couponing not too long ago when I saw the show on tv, and I decided to give it a try. I follow a few ladies on youtube and they post almost weekly what they go buy and the deals they go out and do.
As far as best deals out there you have to make your own judgment. Prices also veries based on region.
The deals and sales are absolutely amazing!
I’ve been saving hundreds of dollars with things we use at home every week.
I don’t do stream couponing, I don’t buy what we don’t use, and I don’t buy more quantity than we can consume in a short period of time. The reason why is.
1- Because I don’t want to have a huge stockpile.
2- I don’t see the need for me to do that. (Not criticizing anyone that does I’m just saying it’s not what I want to do.)
3- I’m fine the way I’m doing things now Thank You! 🙂
Some people will go out and buy 20 bags of sugar just because it was on sale for $1.89 and we had a $.75 off coupon on top of that.
I, on the other hand, I went out and only got 2. That was fine for me I had 2 at home and felt that 2 more bag was enough.
A lot of people think ” Well it’s on sale, great price, why not buy 20? If you can spend that $Money and you want to. Go ahead and do it. I’m just saying I don’t do it.
It’s a choice many people make, and a lot are criticized just because they use coupons.
(Not that’s anyone’s Busyness Anyways. What you do it’s your life.)
Here are a few deals from this week
At this supermarket ( Shaws ) I got
6 boxes of General Mills Cereal
4 Boxes of Puffs Tissue paper
4Nut Exactly Snack
merchandise total was – $41.68
I paid a total of $8.05 after coupons and store discount
And I received a $5.00 stores credit so basically, I got it all for $3.05
My second one was at CVS
I LOVE CVS they always have great deals
2 Xtra Laundry detergent
3 Persil Laundry detergent
2 Gillette Fusion razor
2 Haagen-Dazs Ice Cream
1 Hershey Snack Mix
4 Colgate toothbrushes
2 Colgate toothpaste
All this came out to Merchandise Total – $102.75
I paid $23.61 after Coupons and store discount
and received $26.00 Extrabucks (CVS Money)
So basically, I got it all FREE 🙂
“Sure Foundation”
“Sure Foundation”
Insecurity is probably the worst feeling in the world. It robs you of confidence, rest, and freedom. Just talking about the word floods my mind with so many memories. Being a little girl, afraid of the dark, peeking my eyes just above the covers to see if there really was a monster in my room. As a new kid at school, not knowing a soul, wondering if I would ever find a friend. Auditioning for a musical, nervous and afraid I would forget song lyrics. Picking an outfit for a date, hoping to impress and hold his interest. The day we purchased our first home, wondering if we were grown up enough to handle the responsibility. The way I felt the day we brought home our first baby and the overwhelming reality that we were responsible for his very life. Each of those moments all caused me to feel unsure, and creating a deep desire for something solid to stand on and keep me steady no matter what.
So often, I set my feet upon my circumstances. It’s easy to do because we naturally make agreements with what we can touch and see. For example: If our child has behavior problems in school, it would be easy to then label him a problem child or yourself a bad mom. If a dream falls apart, it would be natural to feel lost and lose sight of your identity. But we’re not called to live by human nature. We are called to walk by the Spirit, and in order to do that, we have to stand on a sure foundation. One that’s been tested and approved. One we know won’t ever be shaken by the quaking and shifting of life. If we stand on what we can see with human eyes, we will constantly shift with an ever changing world. That’s not a life anchored in Jesus. In fact, the bible calls that childish. We are called to grow up into Christ in all things. He is the security we are called to build our lives upon.
What are you standing on today? What are you building your life upon? When the world is afraid of the dark, hiding under the covers, you can be unshakable; shining like a beacon in the night. You can walk through uncertain days because He is your sure foundation.
So this is what the Sovereign Lordsays: “See, I lay a stone in Zion, a tested stone, a precious cornerstone for a sure foundation; the one who relies on it will never be stricken with panic. Isaiah 28:16
Source A 6-day devotion
What kind of tea should you be drinking?
- Chamomile Tea – If you’re about to go to bed, or you’re angry
- Green Tea – If you’re tired, trying to lose weight or felling sick
- Chai Tea – If you’re feeling sluggish or you have a stomach ache.
- Oolong Tea – If you’re burning fat or breaking out.
- Peppermint Tea – If you’re prone to headaches or just sore.
#DIY Life Hacks
“Removing Scuffs from Shoes:
1. Dab the q-tip or cloth in coconut oil spread to needed area, then wipe/rub over the scuffs. I had to do this quite a bit rubbed very lightly, till it was all dissolved.
Experts recommend sanitizing brushes every 15 days.
Baby shampoo is great for cleaning it has to be shampoo with neutral pH.
The cleaning may be the same for all kinds of brushes, there is no need to have a different technique for each type.
Paper towel is more practical to dry the excess water. Let it dry over a towel before storing.
“(…) Keep the brushes away from moisture and aways wash them, especially those in use around the eye area and mouth and those used in creamy or liquid products. If you do not have a specific product to clean them, let them soak for at least a half an hour in a bowl with warm water, some detergent and baking soda. Then under running water, rub the brushes gently on a white plate. This way you can find out when they get really clean. Then, place them on a towel, let the excess water drain until dry and if required, use the hair dryer to give it a quick blow.
#BudgetWithElly the @DaveRamsey Style
Let’s start today with what I did to become frugal and try to be Debt free.
My husband inspired me by listening to ” The Dave Ramsey Show ” and he came home one day and said, can you listen to this guy I think he’s awesome. I decided to listen to Dave Ramsey for the first time and I thought to myself. Can we do this? Can we really be debt free? Is it possible to pay over $10k of credit card bills and actually live like ” No One else, so later in life we can live like no one else? __ Dave Ramsey”
So, who is this Dave anyways?
Dave Ramsey is a personal money management expert, radio talk show host and TV personality who over the years has helped thousands of people become debt free and change their financial lives.
Before I started to listen to Dave, we had to make a decision, to either listen and apply or don’t do it at all. I started to believe we could and believed in GOD we could do it. AM I there? no! not yet, but we have a lot less to go. 🙂
We started with Dave Ramsey’s baby steps that are
Baby Step 1 – $1,000 to start an Emergency Fund
Baby Step 2 – Pay off all debt using the Debt Snowball
Baby Step 3 – 3 to 6 months of expenses in savings
Baby Step 4 – Invest 15% of household income into Roth IRAs and pre-tax retirement
Baby Step 5 – College funding for children
Baby Step 6 – Pay off home early
Baby Step 7 – Build wealth and give!
we are obviously not anywhere close to where we would like to be, but we will get there.
We had to make some sacrifice, especially at the beginning. It’s not easy because it requires sacrifice. And it’s not a lot of fun. We started less than a year ago.
So, I decided to start looking at all the ways I could save, and I started doing the frugal mom thing (Coupons) I save over $200 a month just on coupons alone. Some people are embarrassed to use them, I’m not simple as that. they are there to help you and you’re not stealing from someone, So why not?
A lot of people talk about how to change their financial lives but never touch on the fact that if you or your spouse isn’t ready to change, it isn’t going to happen. You have to want to change.
His plan might not be perfect for everyone, but it does point everyone in the right direction.
What is your life’s purpose? When you find it, you’ll find the motivation you need to live according to your financial plan, even when it’s tough. Making these steps require a budget. In order to succeed with these bigger goals, you’ve got to make it work day-by-day. Paying off your debt snowball requires snowflakes. And you and your spouse need to regularly communicate.
Give it a try, visit the Dave Ramsey site and other budgeting sites and get started. Believe me, It’s never too late 🙂
How #HealthyFriday can help you prevent the future
Did you know these facts
Blood clots can occur in both the veins and the arteries. A clot formed in a vein could restrict the return of blood to the heart, causing pain and swelling as blood gathers behind the clot. Clotting in the arteries typically happens when they harden, and a deposit of plaque narrows the inside of the arteries. As the passage narrows, the heart needs to force blood through the opening, and that strong pressure can rupture the plaque. The body then overcompensates by forming an unnecessary clot in the artery, which can lead to heart attack and stroke.
Smoking is one of the most prominent risk factors for developing blood clots, as well as other heart problems and some chronic diseases. Stop the habit by using nicotine patches and gums, prescription medications, and support groups. Other risk factors for blood clots include obesity, pregnancy, immobility, certain cancers, trauma, age, and family history of blood clots.
Actually, doctors recommend exercise to prevent blood clots. The Department of Health and Human Services recommends that adults get 150 minutes a week of moderate aerobic activity, which can be swimming, walking, dancing, and biking, among others.
Symptoms can be experienced in five places.
1. Heart—chest pain, shortness of breath, chest heaviness.
2. Brain—weakness of the face, difficulty speaking, vision problems, severe headache, dizziness.
3. Arm or leg—swelling, tenderness and warmth on limb, sudden or gradual pain.
4. Lung—racing heart, sharp chest pain, shortness of breath, coughing up blood.
5. Abdomen—severe abdominal pain, vomiting, diarrhea.
DVT most often forms deep in the blood vessels in your leg. This can partially or completely block flow of blood to the heart and damage one-way valves in your veins. About 350,000 Americans are diagnosed with DVT each year, and many more don’t know they have it.
Even healthy, young individuals can develop DVT. As you age, your risk becomes slightly higher, but many patients with it are in their twenties and thirties. Pregnant women are at an increased risk of developing DVT until around six weeks after they give birth.
If you are diagnosed with a blood clot in your vein, your doctor may refer you to a hematologist, a doctor who specializes in blood diseases. If you have a blood clot in your artery, you may have several different doctors involved in your care, such as a cardiologist, neurologist, and hematologist.
Your doctor may prescribe anticoagulants, which prevent clots from forming, and thrombolytic, which dissolve blood clots. You also may undergo catheter-directed thrombolysis, a procedure in which a catheter is inserted into the body and guided to the blood clot, delivering clot-dissolving medication inside of it. You may also have a thrombectomy in which your blood clot is surgically removed.
In reality, blood clots are often preventable. To reduce your risk, live a healthy lifestyle, check your blood pressure at least once a year, and talk to your doctor if you have a family history of blood clots.
DVT & PE
Thinking Out Cloud 