“Be slow to fall into friendship; but when thou art in, continue firm and constant.” — Socrates
“Some people go to priests, others to poetry, I to my friends.” — Virginia Woolf
“Friendship is born at that moment when one person says to another: ‘What! You too? I thought I was the only one.'” ―- C.S. Lewis
No person is your friend who demands your silence, or denies your right to grow.”— Alice Walker
“The greatest gift of life is friendship, and I have received it.” — Hubert H. Humphrey
“One of the most beautiful qualities of friendship is to understand and to be understood.” — Lucius Annaeus Seneca
“Walking with your friend in the dark is better than walking alone in the light.” — Helen Keller
“Love is the only force capable of transforming an enemy into a friend.” — Martin Luther King Jr.
“The glory of friendship is not the outstretched hand, not the kindly smile, nor the joy of companionship; it is the spiritual inspiration that comes to one when you discover that someone else believes in you and is willing to trust you with a friendship.” — Ralph Waldo Emerson
“We cannot tell the precise moment when friendship is formed. As in filling a vessel drop by drop, there is at last a drop which makes it run over; so in a series of kindnesses there is at last one which makes the heart run over.” — Ray Bradbury
“Never leave a friend behind. Friends are all we have to get us through this life – and they are the only things from this world that we could hope to see in the next.” — Dean Koontz
“How many slams in an old screen door? Depends how loud you shut it. How many slices in a bread? Depends how thin you cut it. How much good inside a day? Depends how good you live ’em. How much love inside a friend? Depends how much you give ’em.” — Shel Silverstein
“A friend is someone who knows all about you and still loves you.” -― Elbert Hubbard
“Good friends, good books and a sleepy conscience: this is the ideal life.” -― Mark Twain
“If you live to be a hundred, I want to live to be a hundred minus one day so I never have to live without you.” -― Joan Powers
“There is nothing I would not do for those who are really my friends. I have no notion of loving people by halves, it is not my nature.” ―- Jane Austen
“There is nothing better than a friend, unless it is a friend with chocolate.” -― Linda Grayson
“Friendship is unnecessary, like philosophy, like art…. It has no survival value; rather it is one of those things which give value to survival.” ―- C.S. Lewis
“What is a friend? A single soul dwelling in two bodies.” -― Aristotle
“The friend who holds your hand and says the wrong thing is made of dearer stuff than the one who stays away.” — Barbara Kingsolver
“Love is blind; friendship closes its eyes.” — Friedrich Nietzsche
“Friendship is the hardest thing in the world to explain. It’s not something you learn in school. But if you haven’t learned the meaning of friendship, you really haven’t learned anything.” — Muhammad Ali
‘”He must have known I’d want to leave you.’ “‘No, he must have known you would always want to come back.'” -― J.K. Rowling, Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows
“It is more fun to talk with someone who doesn’t use long, difficult words but rather short, easy words like ‘What about lunch?'” ―- A.A. Milne, Winnie-the-Pooh
“Each friend represents a world in us, a world possibly not born until they arrive, and it is only by this meeting that a new world is born.” -― Anaïs Nin
Drugs in your kids room: 7 things you must do
You are looking through your kids room and run across drugs or alcohol. Disbelief, anger, sadness, there are so many emotions. What should you do?
So you’re cleaning your kid’s room after asking them for the seventh time to do it. While you’re doing it, you run across some type of alcohol or drug. You’re shocked at first, and then some denial comes in. Then you’re angry. Figuring out a good way to handle it can be the difference between building a stronger relationship with your child or creating an even bigger rift in your relationship with them. Here are several things to remember when you have to deal with this situation.
1. You are not alone
Every day, parents all over the world have children that are involved in drugs and alcohol. This doesn’t mean it’s OK, but it does mean you don’t have to go through this challenging, and sometimes uncomfortable, time alone. Alanon family is a great resource for parents who are in the midst of not knowing what to do.
2. Have a plan
It would be really easy to have a negative knee-jerk reaction to finding drugs or alcohol in your child’s room. There will be any number of emotions you will be feeling, and you may want to take care of the problem right then and there. Yes, this could be a crisis, and it’s not something that will be able to solve itself in the next few hours. It will be wise to have a plan of action. When will you talk? Who will you have present with you? What questions will you need to have answered? If you have these kinds of things mapped out ahead of time, your conversation can go much more smoothly as you approach your kid.
3. Don’t go in angry
It is completely understandable to be angry about this new information you have just found out about. Yet, trying to let someone know your concern about them in the midst of anger doesn’t usually work well. It especially doesn’t work well if you try to do it with a teen. They hear and feel your anger instead of the actual message. Anger is a secondary emotion. What you are really feeling is something more akin to hurt, sadness, disappointment or loss. Those are the emotions you should talk about.
4. You are in charge
To some degree, you, as the parent, should be in charge in your child’s life. The fact that you found what you found should let you clearly know that you NEED to stay in charge. Your child is off-course and you need to help him get back on course. The challenge here is if you are off-course yourself. It’s going to be much more difficult to get your child back on track. Part of the reason he could be using drugs is due to something you may or may not be doing. Self-evaluation is going to be important in this process. If you are using illegal drugs and your kid knows it, it will be very difficult for him to listen to you. Make sure you are not doing things that undermine you being in charge.
5. Gather support
You don’t have to do this alone. Since you are in charge it’s going to be important to gather support around yourself and your kid. This support can take form in a variety of ways. The most immediate way to get support is with a spouse or significant other who can help you. Together you can think of some ways to implement a new plan in the home. Gathering other family members, church members or even close friends can be useful as well. If you absolutely have no one in your vicinity to provide support, then the above link to Alanon can be a starting place to find support.
6. Stay consistent
Kids need consistency in their lives. This is no different. Once you have a plan and have gathered support you now need to stay consistent. You can’t let things get in the way of your consistency. Things unfortunately may need to be arranged in your life in order to make things work in a consistent manner.
7. Love your kid
When you had your child, there was no way you imagined she would someday use illegal substances. Instead, you had great hopes and dreams for her. At the core of your relationship with her, there was love. This love caused you to stay up nights with her when she was sick, make her favorite meals, take her to places she loved. This love is what will carry you through now. It will help you stay consistent and do the hard things when it comes to helping your child. Love is simply not an emotion, it’s also an action. You can and must love your child even in the midst of these difficult circumstances.
The important thing to remember through this process is the value of controlled action and love. While this discovery may offer its share of pain, the end result can be one of hope, recovery and understanding.
I miss the days when you would just crawl into my arms and my hugs and kisses were all you seemed to need….. I can only hope that we have taught you the most important lessons about life….ethics, morality….if not in words then at least through our actions and deeds.
You will have temptation from every direction, and will need to have the guts to know what is right and not just follow the ‘pack’! If you still have any doubt on how to proceed…..REMEMBER…now that you are 18, you will always be tried as an adult!
There is always someone smarter than you, dumber than you, more confused than you, more secure, less confident, more sensitive, less reserved….and even more dysfunctional! Enjoy the benefits of meeting some, and show compassion for the others. Roles may be reversed next week!
In these upcoming years, don’t be afraid to roll up your sleeves and work hard for what you want! You have never shied away from hard work…..don’t start now! Believe in yourself and never be afraid to say what you really think or feel. You will be facing adversity……make sure you get up when you are kicked down, holding your head high! Continue to be the loving, caring son/friend I know you to be. Compassion is everything in life!
You have been so focused on who and what you want to be since you were 5 years of age. With the endless possibilities in front of you, don’t be afraid if your goals take a couple of twists and turns. This is only natural and expected. You are surrounded by our love and support.
I am so proud to be your Mom. You are a true gift from God and one of my greatest accomplishments. I cannot wait to see what your future holds, the possibilities are endless.
What if? What if? Have you ever dealt with the what-ifs? Entertaining the what-ifs in your life is the first step to being overtaken with worry. Worry is taking responsibility for things you were never intended to handle. Worry is a lack of trust in the Creator of the universe. Worry says that you can handle it when many times you simply cannot. Are you worried that you worry too much? You don’t defeat worry by worrying about it. You defeat worry by redirecting your concerns to Someone who can actually do something about your situation. It does not mean that you do not take responsibility for the things you are supposed to handle; it just means that you know when you stop and God begins. Worried you don’t know enough about it? Check out what the Bible says!
Fights with your moody teenagers are inevitable, but here are a few things to remember when a battle breaks out.
Teenagers can be terrors, and battles are bound to break out. But not every argument has to be a free-for-all fight. It may seem fitting to make sure your little one knows who’s boss in your home, but it’s important to remember that your kids are still growing, and how you handle arguments with them will teach them how to handle arguments with others. You are a model for your son’s behavior, and you’re teaching your daughter what to expect from the world. So when frustrations rise and tensions boil over, remember this important advice about fights:
1. Words hurt, and cannot be taken back
You can’t un-ring a bell; and you can’t take back hurtful words you say to your child. You may instantly forget what is spewed in a fray, but the worse it was, the longer your child will remember. No matter how bad the conflict seems, your son or daughter needs to know you’ll still be there for him or her once the battle is over and the smoke has cleared. That bond and trust can easily be broken when he or she has to forget something terrible you’ve said to rebuild your relationship.
2. Your child will remember things you forget
It’s not just words you must be careful of in fights; your actions can also speak loudly. Acting aggressively toward your son or daughter – lunging, chasing, grabbing or raising a fist – is unnecessary. And needless to say, making contact in this manner is entirely inappropriate. If your teen loses control and attacks you, your job is to restrain and de-escalate — never to retaliate. Likewise, leaving your child in a fight, either at home or stranded somewhere, will leave him feeling abandoned. Be present and available, even in conflict. And see your fight through until its resolution.
3. You are the adult, and you are in control
Not of your son, but of yourself. He is growing into an independent person with a mind of his own, and no amount of punishment, rage or belittling is going to turn him into who or what you want him to be. He has to find that for himself. But the best way to encourage this is to show him how to be someone you would want him to be; especially in times of crisis.
4. You are a role model
How you respond in times of stress says a lot about you and your parenting. Show your child how a mature adult responds to the world when things are not going your way. You may feel justified in blowing up and getting into a shouting match, but nothing gets heard or resolved over yelling. Make change at indoor volume.
5. Yours is not the only valid opinion
It may be time to sit back and actually listen to your teen’s point of view. Yes he may lie, and yes she may be manipulative, but somewhere deep down your teens are learning to navigate the world, and there is likely some structured and logical thinking. Acknowledge what actually makes sense, and build on that.
Fights with your teens can be stepping stones into adulthood, so make sure you’re laying a good foundation. Teach your sons and daughters to resolve conflict and face an argument with good skills and goals so everyone comes out unscathed and no worse for wear.
Georgia D. Lee seeks to empower, inspire, enrich and educate anyone with an open mind, heart and spirit through her most treasured medium – black and white!
One year ago today I was feeling miserable not knowing what was wrong with me. Everything I ate, I wanted to put back out or it felt like it was stuck in my throat. I ended up like that laying on a hospital bed awaiting my doctors to begin my surgery. I was feeling miserable. I had been at that hospital for about 2 1/2 weeks just doing all kinds of tests till they finally found out what was wrong with me and decided to operate.
Turned out I had what it’s called ” Achalasia of the esophagus” and what is that? You might be asking. That was the same question I was asking all the doctors there. ” What the heck is that?” As they started to explain to me what it was.
Achalasia is a rare disease of the muscle of the esophagus (swallowing tube). The term achalasia means “failure to relax” and refers to the inability of the lower esophageal sphincter (a ring of muscle situated between the lower esophagus and the stomach) to open and let food pass into the stomach.
What can cause the esophagus to close?
A thin area of narrowing in the lower esophagus can intermittently cause difficulty swallowing solid foods. Gastroesophageal reflux disease (GERD). Damage to esophageal tissues from stomach acid backing up into your esophagus can lead to spasm or scarring and narrowing of your lower esophagus. Eosinophilic esophagitis.
What is the surgery for achalasia?
The most common surgical technique used to treat achalasia is called the Heller myotomy, in which the surgeon cuts the muscles at the end of the esophagus and at the top of the stomach. In the past, this surgery was performed through a large (open) incision in the chest or abdomen.
I didn’t think twice and said go ahead do it. All I knew was I was tired of living the way I was. I couldn’t handle it anymore. So off I went to surgery.
With all the support from my husband by my side, I was very confident I would survive another surgery, another battle, another obstacle in my life.
Not only him, but my boys too. My family has been my Rock. My everything in time of need.
I wouldn’t be able to go on without their help. I’m forever grateful.
After my surgery when I thought things would finally be better and my life would turn around. I became depressed. Didn’t want to leave my room. My life was from my downstairs to my upstairs. I didn’t want to do anything. Not because of the way my life was or my family. I love my life and my family. But my sickness just kept on coming and never went away. This surgery was to make me feel better and nothing changed. I was angry. Angry at the doctors, at a lot of things.
Then I decided to turn things around. I sought help ( professional )
Today I’m still very sick as far as my Achalasia, blood clotting disorder, Fibromyalgia,etc..etc..
In between this one year, I changed my mind about being miserable and decided to live my life.
Regardless of how I feel, I will still live on. when I don’t want to get up, or do anything, I will still do it. Just because I need to do so.
I put my faith and hope in the Lord the only one who can give me my daily strength.
I’m not 100% but I try everyday to do better than I did yesterday. With God’s help I’ll slowly get to a point where I can at least cut down on medications. 🙂
May our lives be filled to overflowing with joy. Whether we’re waiting on You for our next step or living according to plan, may we discover peace and joy that come to those who trust in Your will.
Give us the strength and courage to hold onto joy when others are dragging us down. For nobody can rob us of that which flows from Your Spirit.
It’s not easy to rejoice in tribulation, or to give thanks when we experience loss, but all things are possible to those who believe. All things are beautiful to those who put their trust in Your hands.
Insecurity is probably the worst feeling in the world. It robs you of confidence, rest, and freedom. Just talking about the word floods my mind with so many memories. Being a little girl, afraid of the dark, peeking my eyes just above the covers to see if there really was a monster in my room. As a new kid at school, not knowing a soul, wondering if I would ever find a friend. Auditioning for a musical, nervous and afraid I would forget song lyrics. Picking an outfit for a date, hoping to impress and hold his interest. The day we purchased our first home, wondering if we were grown up enough to handle the responsibility. The way I felt the day we brought home our first baby and the overwhelming reality that we were responsible for his very life. Each of those moments all caused me to feel unsure, and creating a deep desire for something solid to stand on and keep me steady no matter what.
So often, I set my feet upon my circumstances. It’s easy to do because we naturally make agreements with what we can touch and see. For example: If our child has behavior problems in school, it would be easy to then label him a problem child or yourself a bad mom. If a dream falls apart, it would be natural to feel lost and lose sight of your identity. But we’re not called to live by human nature. We are called to walk by the Spirit, and in order to do that, we have to stand on a sure foundation. One that’s been tested and approved. One we know won’t ever be shaken by the quaking and shifting of life. If we stand on what we can see with human eyes, we will constantly shift with an ever changing world. That’s not a life anchored in Jesus. In fact, the bible calls that childish. We are called to grow up into Christ in all things. He is the security we are called to build our lives upon.
What are you standing on today? What are you building your life upon? When the world is afraid of the dark, hiding under the covers, you can be unshakable; shining like a beacon in the night. You can walk through uncertain days because He is your sure foundation.
So this is what the Sovereign Lordsays: “See, I lay a stone in Zion, a tested stone, a precious cornerstone for a sure foundation; the one who relies on it will never be stricken with panic. Isaiah 28:16
Mothers are full of various traits that the adults and children of the world need. Often, mothers are nurturing, loving, kind, comforting and leaders. Mothers protect their children, or those close to them, from harm. Teaching either intentionally or by example is what mothers do best. The eyes of a child are always watching and observing and learning from the mothers around them. Every mother has a special blend of attributes that she can use to lead, guide and lift others.
No two mothers are alike
Moms have a tendency to compare themselves to seemingly “perfect” mothers and then proceed with negative self-talk about what a terrible mother they think they are. Stop it! The “seemingly perfect mom” has strengths, but she also has weaknesses. And you have weaknesses, but you also have many strengths that are perfect for your family or those you mother. Some moms have one child while others have several. Some homeschool and others use public schooling. Avoid the “mommy wars.” One is not better than the other; they are just different.
Mother’s Day is a day to be celebrated
Though we as moms may not like Mother’s Day all that much, the people in our lives want to show their love for us. Every day, moms selflessly cook, clean, nurture, lift, inspire and a myriad of other duties. Remember to enjoy and be grateful to those who want to celebrate YOU. Likewise, tell the women in your life how much they mean to you. There is nothing like witnessing the joy on the faces of a small child, a spouse or friends as they do something kind for you to show their love and appreciation. Be grateful and let them shower you with love this Mother’s Day.
Whether you are a mom with no children or many, an empty-nester or a new mother, a loving aunt or friend, Mother’s Day is for you. Your nurturing and caring ways qualify you as a mother. Mothering is a special gift designed to help and comfort others who need your strength. Regardless of how we mother, we are all doing our best with the circumstances and strengths we have. Though there are no perfect mothers, there are many great ones.
Mom’s smiles can brighten any moment,
Mom’s hugs put joy in all our days,
Mom’s love will stay with us forever
and touch our lives in precious ways…
The values you’ve taught,
the care you’ve given,
and the wonderful love you’ve shown,
have enriched my life
in more ways than I can count.
I Love you Mom!