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5 issues to be addressed in Premarital Counseling

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Planning your wedding is stressful enough, but it’s a piece of buttercream-frosted cake compared to the day-to-day reality of actual marriage.

Indeed, so often couples get caught up with everything involved in prepping for their Big Day and romanticizing the concept of marriage that they forget to (or don’t realize that they should) address all of the less-romantic issues that will inevitably arise when two people commit to sharing their lives together.

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Premarital counseling is an excellent way to confront these issues upfront and establish a stronger, healthier relationship moving into matrimony.

1. Money
Finances are a common cause of contention between those about to be married.

2. Time
Time can also be a big problem in a relationship. One may feel neglected if their partner is often away at work, school or other functions. Conversely, a partner may value their space and wish they could spend more time alone.

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3. In-Laws
When you marry someone, you’re not just marrying them – you’re essentially marrying their family as well. It’s important for you to learn how to get along with the whole family, especially if at this point you’re already on shaky ground. It’s also helpful to establish what sort of boundaries as a couple you will put in place. Some family members may be in the habit of just dropping by for a visit. This may upset your new partner. Also, it would be helpful to discuss how you plan to spend time with both sets of in-laws during holidays.

4. Resolving conflict
All couples disagree sometimes. What’s less important than the frequency of conflict (though frequent fighting is a serious issue that must be addressed, of course) is how a couple reacts to said engagements.

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5. Religion
Again, now is not the time to sweep lingering issues under the rug. Statistically, couples that share the same faith (or lack thereof) are more likely to stay together than those that don’t. If your partner is of a different faith, you need to decide whether this is something that will bother you long-term or not. This can be a critical issue.

Be sure to discuss these critical issues during premarital counseling. Ultimately, it all comes down to honesty and respect.

If you’re able to be honest with your partner and respect their traits and beliefs even when you don’t like or agree with them, and if your partner can do the same, then the future of your marriage looks bright.

 

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Marriage: The Final Frontier

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Marriage: The Final Frontier
What is it about human nature? Our ability to appreciate the majestic is only rivaled by one thing: our ability to grow bored with it.

In 1961, President John Kennedy challenged the United States to put a man on the moon. Throughout that decade, the American public had an insatiable appetite for space flight. The media covered nearly every detail of NASA’s efforts, and the astronauts became national heroes. The euphoria culminated in 1969 when Neil Armstrong’s crew landed on the moon, an event witnessed by an estimated half a billion people.

But, amazingly, less than a year later, public interest in moon landings had all but evaporated. Imagine that: A feat as incredible as humans walking on the surface of the moon had become little more than a footnote on the nightly news.

It really shouldn’t surprise us. It’s human nature to lose interest in things that ought to inspire us. Like marriage. A man and a woman stand at an altar, and it seems impossible that their passion could ever fade. Yet, fast forward to the not-too-distant-future, and in all too many cases their life together has begun to drift toward the mundane.

  
It’s natural. But it’s all the more reason why couples must fight this tendency. Make time in your day to connect with one another. Get a babysitter and do something special. Use your imagination, but whatever you do, be proactive about reviving the fire that God used to draw you to your spouse in the first place.

“Place me like a seal over your heart, like a seal on your arm; for love is as strong as death, its jealousy unyielding as the grave. It burns like blazing fire, like a mighty flame. Many waters cannot quench love; rivers cannot sweep it away. If one were to give all the wealth of one’s house for love, it would be utterly scorned.”

‭‭Song of Solomon‬ ‭8:6-7‬ ‭NIV‬‬

For a daily dose of encouragement and perspective, check out Jim Daly

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#PhotoAdAy

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#30DayPhoto

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Day 2 what I wore

I started a 30-day photo challenge and only did a day one.
Didn’t get to keep going. My days have been so busy I can’t keep up with all I’ve set up myself to do.

I started way too many challenges and I never finish LOL.
I wanted to upload all the images up to date so I can catch up in this post and go on day to day as the days go on. I do apologize to the people who follow my blog and expect it to be so right all the time, but hey! I’m only human.

First of all, I’m a wife, (to a pastor of a church) and a mom to 3 teens 🙂 (so this includes all mom and wife duties LOL)
We go to church 3 times a week
I’m currently on a 365-day prayer challenge that I do every day (just don’t have the time to post it)
I’m on a Theological school that I have to study and do a test every month (that’s in Portuguese and extremely hard because of the language) I’m taking a 6.00.1x introduction to computer science as a tool to solve real-world analytical problems at MIT. (Also, really hard and time-consuming)

I have online media groups that requires me to post every day or every week in order for me to remain a member (time-consuming)
So, keeping up with all this and feeling sick, and all doctors appointments is not easy but it’s something I love to do. It’s me 🙂
I just wanted to ask for patience .. and say thank you!

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Day 4 Something Green – My kids playing at the Gillette Stadium
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Day 5 – From a High Angle
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Day 6- From a Low Angle 
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Here Come New Ideas for A New Beginning

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A 365 Days Challenge Day #1

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How do you start fresh with  God? How do you close the distance between yourself and your Creator? It really is very simple: Come out of hiding. 

In the Bible we read the account of Adam and Eve who ate the forbidden fruit, realized they were uncovered, and hid from God. So God walked through the garden calling out, ” where are you?” God helped this couple after they stepped out into the light and said, ” Here we are.” Their honesty about where they were and what they had done opened the door for God to clothe them and promise them a Savior who would rescue them from their fallen condition. 

God comes into our lives asking the same question: “Where are you?” When we honestly face who we are and what we have become, the door is opened for us to have a genuine relationship with Him. You can’t dress up for God. He deals in the currency of honesty. Bring the real you to the real God and watch transformation take place. 

Lor God, help me to admit that I need you. I’ve been hiding for way too long. Love myself for who I am. I need to bee and feel alive for myself and do this for me and no one else.

God, make a fresh start in me, shape a Genesis week from the  chaos of my life. Psalm 51:10

 

Create in me a pure heart, O God,
    and renew a steadfast spirit within me. Psalm 51:10 (NIV)