family

When Life Gives you lemon 🍋

There are definitely times when bad things happen so Good things can come your way.
I’m a true believer of ” Everything happens for a reason. ” either it’s a good or bad one.
Last year I was living a life that I would come home every day shower and sleep. To wake up in the morning and do the same thing over and over.

I liked what I was doing. Just not how it was happening. Working over 48 hrs a week I started getting sick again. And ended up having a lot of doctors appointment etc.

as I was getting all these appointments I was no longer able to put all my effort into my job.
One of the days I had to call out because of being sick. I got asked by my Manager to find another job.

I couldn’t agree more with him that I needed something else.

Me and Chris always had this dream of working a Monday – Friday. 9-5pm paid holidays. And able to take time off.

The job I had obviously wasn’t allowing me to do so. And not to remind you it made me sick all over again due to stress and long hour days.

I decided to post my resume online. Hoping and praying for the best.

I decided to give my two weeks at my current job.

I remember feeling sad, annoyed and stressed.
I do have a lot of bills to pay. So I was very worried I wouldn’t find anything.

I sent out a few applications that day.
To my surprise, I received a phone call that morning ( when I had just given my 2 weeks ).
It was this amazing lady ( very friendly) looking for an office manager. I set the appointment for an interview.

I left that company that day in tears. I couldn’t believe what just happened.

I was so amazed. And happy I could of left there jumping up and down in joy.

I got offered a job as an office manager.
Working Monday – Friday 9-5pm. Getting paid holidays. Time off as I need it. With an amazing family. That knows how to be a boss and actually care for their employees.


True I don’t know them yet. But I have a feeling this is gonna be a lifetime relationship.
I thank God daily for this opportunity a dream that came true without me even deserving it.
Ok I might deserve it 😂, but you all know what I mean? I didn’t expect it to work so fast.
I’m sitting at my desk this afternoon and all I can think about is how grateful I am. 🙂

Isaque has started a new job and it’s a great opportunity for him.

Joshua will start a new job Monday.

Gabe is doinggreat at his job.

Chris also got offered a job and opportunity that made him very happy. Now we have time to work and enjoy our lives.Couldn’t ask for more.

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Elly & Chris Filho

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5 issues to be addressed in Premarital Counseling

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Planning your wedding is stressful enough, but it’s a piece of buttercream-frosted cake compared to the day-to-day reality of actual marriage.

Indeed, so often couples get caught up with everything involved in prepping for their Big Day and romanticizing the concept of marriage that they forget to (or don’t realize that they should) address all of the less-romantic issues that will inevitably arise when two people commit to sharing their lives together.

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Premarital counseling is an excellent way to confront these issues upfront and establish a stronger, healthier relationship moving into matrimony.

1. Money
Finances are a common cause of contention between those about to be married.

2. Time
Time can also be a big problem in a relationship. One may feel neglected if their partner is often away at work, school or other functions. Conversely, a partner may value their space and wish they could spend more time alone.

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3. In-Laws
When you marry someone, you’re not just marrying them – you’re essentially marrying their family as well. It’s important for you to learn how to get along with the whole family, especially if at this point you’re already on shaky ground. It’s also helpful to establish what sort of boundaries as a couple you will put in place. Some family members may be in the habit of just dropping by for a visit. This may upset your new partner. Also, it would be helpful to discuss how you plan to spend time with both sets of in-laws during holidays.

4. Resolving conflict
All couples disagree sometimes. What’s less important than the frequency of conflict (though frequent fighting is a serious issue that must be addressed, of course) is how a couple reacts to said engagements.

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5. Religion
Again, now is not the time to sweep lingering issues under the rug. Statistically, couples that share the same faith (or lack thereof) are more likely to stay together than those that don’t. If your partner is of a different faith, you need to decide whether this is something that will bother you long-term or not. This can be a critical issue.

Be sure to discuss these critical issues during premarital counseling. Ultimately, it all comes down to honesty and respect.

If you’re able to be honest with your partner and respect their traits and beliefs even when you don’t like or agree with them, and if your partner can do the same, then the future of your marriage looks bright.

 

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“Sure Foundation”

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“Sure Foundation”
Insecurity is probably the worst feeling in the world. It robs you of confidence, rest, and freedom. Just talking about the word floods my mind with so many memories. Being a little girl, afraid of the dark, peeking my eyes just above the covers to see if there really was a monster in my room. As a new kid at school, not knowing a soul, wondering if I would ever find a friend. Auditioning for a musical, nervous and afraid I would forget song lyrics. Picking an outfit for a date, hoping to impress and hold his interest. The day we purchased our first home, wondering if we were grown up enough to handle the responsibility. The way I felt the day we brought home our first baby and the overwhelming reality that we were responsible for his very life. Each of those moments all caused me to feel unsure, and creating a deep desire for something solid to stand on and keep me steady no matter what.

So often, I set my feet upon my circumstances. It’s easy to do because we naturally make agreements with what we can touch and see. For example: If our child has behavior problems in school, it would be easy to then label him a problem child or yourself a bad mom. If a dream falls apart, it would be natural to feel lost and lose sight of your identity. But we’re not called to live by human nature. We are called to walk by the Spirit, and in order to do that, we have to stand on a sure foundation. One that’s been tested and approved. One we know won’t ever be shaken by the quaking and shifting of life. If we stand on what we can see with human eyes, we will constantly shift with an ever changing world. That’s not a life anchored in Jesus. In fact, the bible calls that childish. We are called to grow up into Christ in all things. He is the security we are called to build our lives upon.

What are you standing on today? What are you building your life upon? When the world is afraid of the dark, hiding under the covers, you can be unshakable; shining like a beacon in the night. You can walk through uncertain days because He is your sure foundation.

So this is what the Sovereign Lordsays:  “See, I lay a stone in Zion, a tested stone,  a precious cornerstone for a sure foundation;  the one who relies on it  will never be stricken with panic.  Isaiah 28:16
Source A 6-day devotion
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Marriage: The Final Frontier

  
Marriage: The Final Frontier
What is it about human nature? Our ability to appreciate the majestic is only rivaled by one thing: our ability to grow bored with it.

In 1961, President John Kennedy challenged the United States to put a man on the moon. Throughout that decade, the American public had an insatiable appetite for space flight. The media covered nearly every detail of NASA’s efforts, and the astronauts became national heroes. The euphoria culminated in 1969 when Neil Armstrong’s crew landed on the moon, an event witnessed by an estimated half a billion people.

But, amazingly, less than a year later, public interest in moon landings had all but evaporated. Imagine that: A feat as incredible as humans walking on the surface of the moon had become little more than a footnote on the nightly news.

It really shouldn’t surprise us. It’s human nature to lose interest in things that ought to inspire us. Like marriage. A man and a woman stand at an altar, and it seems impossible that their passion could ever fade. Yet, fast forward to the not-too-distant-future, and in all too many cases their life together has begun to drift toward the mundane.

  
It’s natural. But it’s all the more reason why couples must fight this tendency. Make time in your day to connect with one another. Get a babysitter and do something special. Use your imagination, but whatever you do, be proactive about reviving the fire that God used to draw you to your spouse in the first place.

“Place me like a seal over your heart, like a seal on your arm; for love is as strong as death, its jealousy unyielding as the grave. It burns like blazing fire, like a mighty flame. Many waters cannot quench love; rivers cannot sweep it away. If one were to give all the wealth of one’s house for love, it would be utterly scorned.”

‭‭Song of Solomon‬ ‭8:6-7‬ ‭NIV‬‬

For a daily dose of encouragement and perspective, check out Jim Daly

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Loving the Stranger #Marriage

Loving the Stranger
You wouldn’t marry a complete stranger, would you? Well – surprise! – if you’re married, that’s exactly what you’ve done.

On our wedding day, we all innocently believe the same myth: that we know and understand the person we’re marrying. But every newlywed eventually discovers that getting to know the depths of someone’s heart takes years. That’s the nature of relationship, especially one as intimate as marriage. So in that sense, we all marry a stranger. We’re in love with what little we know about our spouse, but we don’t know them. Not really.

  
Maybe that’s why Stanley Hauerwas defines a successful marriage as “learning how to love and care for the stranger to whom you find yourself married.” What does he mean? Simply this: In countless ways, the person we commit to on our wedding day will not be the same person five, ten, or twenty years from now. In fact, neither will we. Marriage changes us. So does raising children, careers, the aging process, and other significant events in our lives.

That’s why it’s important to understand that marriage is not a stopping point where we instantly know our spouse fully and completely. It’s a journey through life between a man and woman, both of whom continually grow and change across their years together. As one speaker said, “When people get married, they tend to believe they’ve found a finished statue, when in reality, they’ve merely found the block of marble from which their spouse will emerge.” Commit to loving your spouse and helping them grow more Christ-like each day.

“Instead, speaking the truth in love, we will grow to become in every respect the mature body of him who is the head, that is, Christ.”

‭‭Ephesians‬ ‭4:15‬ ‭NIV‬‬

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“Till death do us part.” 

  
“So they are no longer two, but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate.””

‭‭Matthew‬ ‭19:6‬ ‭

Commitment
Traditional marriage vows include the phrase, “Till death do us part.” Unfortunately, these words have become something of a ceremonial cliché rather than a statement of deep commitment to God and another human being.

Travel through our country’s small towns, and you’ll likely come across an array of honorable folks who still seal their agreements with a handshake and who consider their word an unbreakable bond. In the business world, contracts are much more formal, of course, crafted with highly detailed legal jargon that reads like a foreign language. Whatever form these commitments take, the purpose has always been the same – to offer protection, not when everything is running smoothly, but when things fall apart.

Commitment is perhaps no more important than when it comes to marriage. It provides strength and stability when a relationship encounters challenges. Unfortunately, many couples take an opposite approach when things turn sour – they run, rather than digging in their heels when commitment requires it the most.

As the president of an organization dedicated to strengthening marriages, trust me, I understand that relationships can encounter serious difficulties that are not easily resolved. But with the highest rate of divorce in the world, it’s evident that our society rushes too quickly toward marriage break-up instead of diligently working to restore a relationship back to health.

Commitment is foundational to surviving conflict. It enables us to focus on honoring God and serves as the fuel for us to work through our struggles with persistence and determination. The next time you find yourself in a heated disagreement with your spouse, commit to drawing closer together instead of running away.
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I just gotta say this…

A 365 Days Challenge Day #6

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A Place for Prayer

The great thing about meeting with God is that you can meet Him anywhere. He can be found on the factory floor just as readily as He can be experienced in a cathedral. If you could find a way to travel to the most distant galaxy, you would find that God is already there.

But just as a couple much in love will seek out a quiet place to be alone together, so you may also wish to find a place all your own to meet with God. You might find a place in your home where you can be free to focus on God. Or you might enjoy connecting with God outdoors along a nature trail or in a park.

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Maybe you would prefer to meet privately with God in a church building or mix it up so you don’t get bogged down by too much routine.

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As you move forward in your journey, you’ll identify the atmosphere that works best for you. A place for prayer helps you grow in your friendship with God.

God, the place that works best for me to communicate with You is…

The Best place for me to communicate with God is where ever I communicate period. I think the important thing is to separate the time and communicate, and by doing it is what really matters. Of course we all have our little secret special place like our closet, for me, it’s the laundry room or the shower hahaha.
I always have long dialogs at those special times. 🙂

He said, ” My presence shall go with you, and I will give you rest.” Exodus 33:14 NASB

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Dear Lord, 
You have the power to do more than I ask, more than I can imagine!
When I come to you in prayer then, let me do so knowing what great power You hold over any situation in my life.
I cannot measure Your power or truly even conceive of it in 
its fullness, but I know that the One who designed the universe by simply speaking it into being has the power to design my life.
I believe You can remold and reshape me and any circumstance in which I may find myself. 

God, I praise and thank You for my life and all that You are doing even now to help me.
Lord, I thank You for Your powerful and loving Spirit and for shaping me in ways that only serve to make me stronger. 

Amen. 

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Budget · Challenge · coupons · family · Family Share · frugal · savings

#BudgetWithElly the @DaveRamsey Style

Let’s start today with what I did to become frugal and try to be Debt free.

My husband inspired me by listening to ” The Dave Ramsey Show ” and he came home one day and said; can you listen to this guy I think he’s awesome.

I decided to listen to Dave Ramsey for the first time and I thought to myself. Can we do this? Can we really be debt free? Is it possible to pay over $10k of credit card bills and actually live like ” No One else, so later in life we can live like no one else? __ Dave Ramsey”
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So who is this Dave anyways?
Dave Ramsey is a personal money management expert, radio talk show host and TV personality who over the years has helped thousands of people become debt free and change their financial lives.

Before I started to listen to Dave we had to make a decision, to either listen and apply or don’t do it at all. I started to believe we could and believed in GOD we could do it. AM I there? no! not yet, but we have a lot less to go. 🙂

We started with Dave Ramsey’s baby steps that are

Baby Step 1 – $1,000 to start an Emergency Fund
Baby Step 2 – Pay off all debt using the Debt Snowball
Baby Step 3 – 3 to 6 months of expenses in savings
Baby Step 4 – Invest 15% of household income into Roth IRAs and pre-tax retirement
Baby Step 5 – College funding for children
Baby Step 6 – Pay off home early
Baby Step 7 – Build wealth and give!
we are obviously not anywhere close to where we would like to be, but we will get there.
We had to make some sacrifice, especially at the beginning. It’s not easy because it requires sacrifice. And it’s not a lot of fun. We started less than a year ago.
So I decided to start looking at all the ways I could save and I started doing the frugal mom thing ( Coupons ) I save over $200 a month just on coupons alone. Some people are embarrassed to use them, I’m not simple as that. they are there to help you and you’re not stealing from someone, So why not?

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A lot of people talk about how to change their financial lives but never touch on the fact that if you or your spouse isn’t ready to change, it isn’t going to happen. You have to want to change.

His plan might not be perfect for everyone, but it does point everyone in the right direction.

What is your life’s purpose? When you find it, you’ll find the motivation you need to live according to your financial plan, even when it’s tough.

Making these steps require a budget. In order to succeed with these bigger goals, you’ve got to make it work day-by-day. Paying off your debt snowball requires snowflakes. And you and your spouse need to regularly communicate.

Give it a try, visit the Dave Ramsey site and other budgeting sites and get started. Believe me, It’s never too late 🙂

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4 ways to have a Family Saturday

We all have busy lives. Finding time today is almost impossible

If you’re like me, you feel like there’s still stuff to do at the end of the day. Tempted to keep your computer and phone on at all times. Fighting distractions in your brain even when with your family.

You need to have priorities. In the end, our family is all that matters, so don’t push your family to the bottom of your to-do list.
If you want a stronger marriage and family, start by investing more time.

https://twitter.com/4Guys_1Girl
Family Date Night

1. Remember that “Date Night” doesn’t have to happen at night

Look for ways to connect during the day.

2. Never walk into your house while you’re on your phone

I make sure to end the call before walking through the door.

3. Have set times where everybody is unplugged

Try to shut down the electronics more often. Talking with each other is always better than texting with somebody else!

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4. Prioritize family time AND one-on-one time

Plan activities you can all do as a family, also plan for one-on-one time with each other and with each of your kids individually. That time will be golden for your kids.

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Protecting Your #Child from • Soul Poison •  #Parenting 

Protecting Your Child from “Soul Poison”
There are some decent, even values-oriented things on television for children these days. But, as you know very well, there’s a lot of garbage, too. And in between those two extremes, there are shows that are mostly good but have some words scattered in them that little ears shouldn’t be hearing – or big ears, for that matter. Along comes a service called TV Guardian – which automatically replaces a naughty word with a nice word, thus removing what could be bad for your child. Occasionally, the replacements are actually a little amusing. Like the word “sex,” for example. The replacement word is “hugs.” Which gets a little interesting when someone asks, “So what will be the hugs of your baby?” But I do think TV Guardian is a pretty good idea.

Something like TV Guardian was invented for parents who realize a very important assignment that they have; to protect their children from anything that could harm them. Of course, a parent is going to protect their son or daughter from physical harm – like getting too close to the edge of a cliff or running onto the Interstate. But Mom and Dad have no less a responsibility for protecting their kids from things that can hurt their soul. And there’s a lot of soul poison out there.

There is a ten-word challenge that underscores where the front lines of the battle are for any life – including that of your children. Proverbs 4:23 begins with these attention-getting words, “Above all else…” Then these ten words – “Guard your heart, for it is the wellspring of life.” In other words,be careful about what gets into your heart – or into your child’s heart – because it is the reservoir from which everything else flows. Tweet: be careful about what gets into your heart - or into your child's heart - because it is the reservoir from which everything else flows.

Yes, one front in the battle for a child’s pure heart is related to what they listen to and watch. It’s amazing how we will allow someone to portray right in our living room, on TV, DVD, or Netflix, things we would never, ever allow to be done in our living room – sexually, for example. We allow comedy into our home and into their heart that trivializes sin that ruins lives; not realizing that our kids are learning to laugh about things that are eternally serious. No matter what the parental peer pressure of what other parents are allowing and what the culture says is “must see” stuff, we’ve got to stand our ground on not allowing our kids to mentally eat out of the garbage can.

 
But guarding their heart is so much bigger than TV or movies or music. It’s about the poison that comes from us. The bitterness they’re learning by listening to us, the anger, the self-centeredness, the putdowns of other people, the names they hear us call people, the prejudice they hear in the way we talk about others, the disrespect they hear us expressing toward people at work, at church – or even toward their Mother or Father. That’s more deadly poison than anything the media can pump out. Our precious children need “Parent Guardian” – to protect them from the poison that they see modeled in living color by a Mom or Dad.

The DVR in your son’s or daughter’s heart is always recording. It’s always capturing what it hears, and the impressions are shaping who they’re becoming. You are the guardian, assigned to your child by God, to protect that young heart from poison and infection – even if (especially if) it’s coming from you.

Going Deeper

One undesirable trait I see in my child that reminds me of myself is…

One thing I could do to help them and me grow in that area is…

“Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it.”

Proverbs‬ ‭4:23‬ ‭NIV‬‬ Tweet: “Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it.” Proverbs‬ ‭4:23‬ ‭NIV‬‬ - Via- @4Guys_1Girl

“I will sing of your love and justice; to you, Lord, I will sing praise. I will be careful to lead a blameless life— when will you come to me? I will conduct the affairs of my house with a blameless heart. I will not look with approval on anything that is vile. I hate what faithless people do; I will have no part in it. The perverse of heart shall be far from me; I will have nothing to do with what is evil. Whoever slanders their neighbor in secret, I will put to silence; whoever has haughty eyes and a proud heart, I will not tolerate. My eyes will be on the faithful in the land, that they may dwell with me; the one whose walk is blameless will minister to me. No one who practices deceit will dwell in my house; no one who speaks falsely will stand in my presence. Every morning I will put to silence all the wicked in the land; I will cut off every evildoer from the city of the Lord.”

‭‭Psalm‬ ‭101:1-8‬ ‭NIV‬‬

Study by Ron Hutchcraft