My Baby boy is turning  “18”  

I can’t believe how fast time has gone. My 3rd child already an adult. 😦
I’m so proud of all my kids… despite any mistake they have ever made ( not like I or anyone else never made any ) They are very good kids.
I’ve pushed my kids to always strive to do their best. Never look back or to the side and wish they’ve done anything different. Only to look forward and say I CAN DO IT BETTER.
Push hard to achieve their dreams.

As I was growing up I never had the chance to be or become what they can become. So I expect a lot out of them. I promise it’s only for their own good. I’m a strict but a ” Cool Mom ” I like things to be done right ( ok maybe sometimes perfect LOL ) But if we don’t shoot for perfection things gets lost along the way and they become messy.

I like things to get done. Don’t ever leave for tomorrow what you can do today.
It’s just the way I see it. I know I did all I could to teach my kids the right way. The best way. I have no regrets. I’m not ashamed of my past. I’ve made a lot of mistakes and today I am who I am because of my choices and the mercy of GOD. If it wasn’t for GOD I wouldn’t be here. I have no regrets on how I raised my kids. I know the way I did it, thought them how to be responsible and mature. Even though some days they don’t act like it hahaha. but they know how. That I’m sure of.
I have a relationship with my kids where I can talk to them and they can talk to me. They know they can trust me. They know I will forever and always be here for them no matter what.
There is NO ONE above them. ( not talking about GOD ) My husband feels the same way. There is no one above his kids to him either. We both have made that very clear.

We love our family more than anything in life. God has given us the opportunity to have this family. Therefor we give it our all…  ❤

Gabe will soon be 18
Isaque will be 19
Joshua will be 21

All I got to say is

THANK YOU JESUS for the opportunity you have given us to Love and Care for our family..

Masterlist of Bullet Journal Ideas

1. Books To Read- Color them in as you go! Or make a fun list of them and check them off one at a time.

2. All About Me- Make doodles of things you love, add quotes, draw yourself!

3. Future Log- There are so many ways to make this page. Please do some research to see which would work best for you

4. Movies To Watch- Pretty self-explanatory, but there are many ways to do this page too

5. Skills To Learn- Jot down all the things you want to learn

6. Important Numbers and Addresses- In case of emergency of course. Also, be careful what you put in this part for your own privacy reasons

7. Year In Pixels- Honestly, one of my favorite pages

8. Fonts, Banners, and Frame Ideas- For practice and to choose from when you are having trouble being creative

9. Snail Mail Log- Keeping a list of people who you want to send letters to

10. Savings Tracker- It’s always fun to see how much you have saved up

11. TV Series Tracker- Keep track of all the shows you still need to binge

12. Monthly Challenges- I know I haven’t been helpful with this lately, but you can always search for challenges on my page

13. Music Playlists- A list of songs that describe you, your goals, things you love, etc.

14. Timeline of Your Life- This was hard for me to make. My life isn’t all that exciting

15. Inspiration Page- Fill it with quotes, pictures, memories, etc.

16. Self-Care List/Ideas- I posted many lists like this on my Pinterest if you want more ideas

17. Monthly/Yearly Memories- Look back on all the good and bad things that you’ve gotten over and endured.

18. Sleep Tracker- See how many hours you get each night. This also works well when paired with number 7.

19. Me Time Log- Keep track of how many hours you spend with yourself. We all need to learn to love on ourselves a little more.

20. Tiny Adventures- Go out of your comfort zone and go on some tiny adventures like reading in public, talking to a stranger, giving people compliments, etc.

21. Word Tracker- For those who are writers who like to procrastinate

22. Daily To-Do List- This can be done on your weekly pages or you can make a page specifically for daily sticky notes.

23. Blog Post Ideas- Got an idea, but you’re not at your computer or have what you need for your post? WRITE IT DOWN

24. Fitness Log- Keep track of how much and when you work out or stretch or do yoga or and of those fun physical activities.

25. Food Log- If you’re trying to lose weight or just get healthy or just want to track your food intake for fun, this is for you!

26. Meal Prep- I love how cute and helpful these pages can be.

27. Gift Lists- Ever see something and say to yourself, “Man, ____ would really like that”? Keep a list of things people would like so that you don’t worry about it when it comes to holiday time or birthdays.

28. Grocery Lists- Every time I go shopping, I forget something because I didn’t write it down.

29. Goals- Oh, yes! It’s 2018. We need some goals. Monthly, weekly, daily, YEARLY. Just get some goals and aim for them.

30. Recipes To Try- I see nice recipes all the time on Facebook, but I never think about them again after I keep scrolling. It’s bad.

31. Daily Affirmations- Give yourself some compliments and some emotional support

32. Business Plan- Make yourself a good businesswoman or businessman or businessperson in 2018. You got this.

33. Birthdays- Keep track of all those important people in your life that need to be remembered on their special day.

34. Work Hour Log- Sometimes we don’t keep track of all the things we get paid for. Actual work, babysitting, photography jobs, writing jobs, pet sitting, house sitting, etc.

35. Wishlists- Not so you can #treatyourself, but so that you can make note of things you really want.

36. Gratitude Log- It’s always good to have a moment of gratitude with yourself. Make it a monthly challenge if you need to!

37. Quotes- Your own, friend quotes, celebrity quotes, author quotes, and lyrics.

38. Illustrations and Doodles- Doodling helps you keep your mind fresh and ready to react quickly to situations.

39. Jokes- Your own, ones you heard, ones you read, etc.

40. New Discoveries and Interesting Facts- Find a new interesting fact? How about that lemonade is basically Sprite in almost any other country than America?

41. Travel Log- Places you want to go! There are so many ways to do this, so look up different versions before starting!

42. Family and Friend Favorites- Their favorite colors, animals, stores, places, hobbies, etc.

43. DIY Projects- Things you want to try out someday.

44. Chore List- Keep track of when you do your chores so that your house doesn’t become disgusting or dusty.

45. Bucketlist- What do you want to do before graduation, moving out, marriage, having kids, etc.

46. Story Ideas- I always come up with story ideas and then when I sit down to write them, I blank.

47. Period Log- For people with periods that have many PMS symptoms or even PMDD symptoms. This is a great way to show your doctor all of the things you go through each cycle.

48. Words That Make You Happy- Silly words, ugly words, words that are fun to say, etc.

49. Things That Make You Happy- People, places, and things.

50. Monthly Habits- Water intake, cleaning, bathing, exercising, reading, etc.

51. Story Titles- This can be titles for books, short stories, poems, or just nice sounding titles for anything.

52. Made Up Words- I make myself laugh with all the words I make up on the daily.

53. Follower Counter- This page keeps me inspired to keep doing what I love.

54. Index- Always have an index for easy access to the pages you want to find.

55. Icons- Sometimes we need to have icons to make our pages pretty. Sometimes we make too many icons and never use them (me).

56. Packing List- For those who travel often or stay at friends’ houses more than our own, it’s good not to forget the things we need.

57. Morning Routines- Our bodies need routines for mornings to get us ready for the day.

58. Nightly Routines- Our bodies need routines for nights to prepare us for sleep. (see what I did there?)

59. Weight Tracker- If you’re struggling with your weight, keep a chart tracker or add your daily weight to your calendar.

60. Pen Test Page- If you get new pens, highlighters, or markers, its best to test them out before using them.

61. Brain Dump- Sometimes we just need to jot down ideas or thoughts. It’s okay if they don’t make sense.

62. Spending Log- Keep track of what you spend because you might need that someday.

63. Water Tracker- HYDRATE

64. Habit Tracker Reward System- This is something I came up with myself, so if you have questions, message me!

65. Name Lists (For Babies and Stories)- Keep a list of cool names for characters or even future babies.

66. Looking Forward To…- Birthdays, holidays, raises, pay days, vacations, etc.

67. Compliment Lists- Make a list of your go-to compliments, your favorite ones people have given you, etc.

68. Level 10 Life- Please look up what this is before jumping into it!

69. Pet Care Log- Keep track of how much you do with your pets. Walks, play time, park time, play dates, baths, etc.

70. Achievements- What have you done that you are proud of?

71. Weekly Log- Keep track of your week. This is one of the most used pages in any bullet journal honestly.

72. Monthly Log- Another overly used page in any bullet journal. Very important.

73. Daily Log- I don’t do this too often, but I know it helps others who really need a whole page for each day.

74. Bill Tracker- This was fun to make and something I will be using now

75. Income Tracker- How much and how frequently do you get paid?

76. Deadline Page- Prepare yourself for things that you need to get done. Do not procrastinate this year!

77. Vocabulary Practice- Sometimes we just need to educate ourselves on our own terms. (and with our own terms. Anyone? Anyone?)

78. Doctor Appointment Log- If you don’t want to add them to your calendar or they are too far out to add to the calendar you’re using.

79. Username and Password List- Be careful with this page. If someone finds your bullet journal, this could be bad.

80. Monthly Cover Page- These are so cute! I just started doing them, but they make my journal so artsy and pretty.

81. Dream Log- This is a fun one. Track your dreams. This would be good to line up with how many hours you get as well.

82. Favorites List- What are YOUR favorites? Movies, snacks, drinks, subjects, people, colors, animals, etc.

83. Habits To Break- Do you bite your nails? Quote The Office too much? Throw clothes into piles on your floor? STOP THAT.

84. Small Things That Matter- Puppies, getting up in the morning, pennies, smiling at yourself, laughter, etc. Remind yourself that there is good in the world.

85. Things To Sell- Get rid of the things you don’t need. Or make things to sell! Be prosperous this year.

86. School Schedule- High school and college students really need this. Even teachers do too. Make a chart of your classes, room numbers, buildings, and times.

87. House Projects- Things that need fixing or improvements around the house.

88. Day Trip Ideas- Fun places to go when you have the time.

89. Things I Am Bad At- It’s okay to admit our shortcomings and work on them. Or just accept them for what they are.

90. Resolutions- YES! Make yourself this better this year. Be the best you.

91. Crochet/Knit Log- When making a blanket, small items, or just keeping track of your improvements in your skill.

92. Future Planning- Make a list of the things you want in your future and how you plan on getting them.

93. Quirk List- Ever notice you do small little weird things? Make a list to appreciate who you are.

94. Who Borrowed What- Sometimes people borrow things and you forget until you need it again. By then, they threw it out or gave it to someone else.

95. Six Word Stories- Get those creative juices pumping.

96. Love Yourself- Write down all the things you love about yourself. Appreciate yourself.

97. Paying It Back- Honestly, a good page to have, but it doesn’t get much attention from me.

98. Childhood Dreams- We should always try to look back on what we thought we wanted

99. Good Deed Ideas- Ever think “wow, wouldn’t it be great if I could _____”?

100. Mind Mapping- There are a few reasons I really enjoy this, but it really helps me get my thoughts and ideas out more easily

“Sure Foundation”

Insecurity is probably the worst feeling in the world. It robs you of confidence, rest, and freedom. Just talking about the word floods my mind with so many memories. Being a little girl, afraid of the dark, peeking my eyes just above the covers to see if there really was a monster in my room. As a new kid at school, not knowing a soul, wondering if I would ever find a friend. Auditioning for a musical, nervous and afraid I would forget song lyrics. Picking an outfit for a date, hoping to impress and hold his interest. The day we purchased our first home, wondering if we were grownup enough to handle the responsibility. The way I felt the day we brought home our first baby, and the overwhelming reality that we were responsible for his very life. Each of those moments all caused me to feel unsure, and creating a deep desire for something solid to stand on and keep me steady no matter what.

So often, I set my feet upon my circumstances. It’s easy to do, because we naturally make agreements with what we can touch and see. For example: If our child has behavior problems in school, it would be easy to then label him a problem child or yourself a bad mom. If a dream falls apart, it would be natural to feel lost and lose sight of your identity. But we’re not called to live by human nature. We are called to walk by the Spirit, and in order to do that we have to stand on a sure foundation. One that’s been tested and approved. One we know won’t ever be shaken by the quaking and shifting of life. If we stand on what we can see with human eyes, we will constantly shift with an ever changing world. That’s not a life anchored in Jesus. In fact, the bible calls that childish. We are called to grow up into Christ in all things. He is the security we are called to build our lives upon.

What are you standing on today? What are you building your life upon? When the world is afraid of the dark, hiding under the covers, you can be unshakable; shining like a beacon in the night. You can walk through uncertain days because He is your sure foundation.

“So this is what the Sovereign Lord says: “See, I lay a stone in Zion, a tested stone, a precious cornerstone for a sure foundation; the one who relies on it will never be stricken with panic.”

‭‭Isaiah‬ ‭28:16‬ ‭NIV‬‬

From a 6 day devotional : unshakable moms

Depression can be experienced at many levels and for many different reasons. It’s rarely an easy thing to get out of depression. And, of course, there is a difference between being depressed and living in depression. Something may go differently than you had hoped and you feel depressed. But when your choices and your life begin to look different because of the negative feelings you have inside, then you are facing depression.

Depression is the fruit of something deeper. You shouldn’t feel ashamed about your feelings, but you must know that God desires something better for you. He wants to comfort you and restore you to a life of joy. Get quiet before God and let Him be your counselor.

“How long shall I take counsel in my soul, having sorrow in my heart daily? how long shall mine enemy be exalted over me?”

‭‭Psalms‬ ‭13:2‬ ‭KJV‬‬

“O Lord God of my salvation, I have cried day and night before thee: Let my prayer come before thee: incline thine ear unto my cry; For my soul is full of troubles: and my life draweth nigh unto the grave. I am counted with them that go down into the pit: I am as a man that hath no strength: Free among the dead, like the slain that lie in the grave, whom thou rememberest no more: and they are cut off from thy hand.”

‭‭Psalms‬ ‭88:1-5‬ ‭KJV‬‬

“Then saith he unto them, My soul is exceeding sorrowful, even unto death: tarry ye here, and watch with me.”

‭‭Matthew‬ ‭26:38‬ ‭KJV‬‬

“Why, my soul, are you downcast? Why so disturbed within me? Put your hope in God, for I will yet praise him, my Savior and my God.”

‭‭Psalm‬ ‭43:5‬ ‭NIV‬‬

“God is our refuge and strength, an ever-present help in trouble.”

‭‭Psalm‬ ‭46:1‬ ‭NIV‬‬

“But I pray to you, Lord, in the time of your favor; in your great love, O God, answer me with your sure salvation. Rescue me from the mire, do not let me sink; deliver me from those who hate me, from the deep waters. Do not let the floodwaters engulf me or the depths swallow me up or the pit close its mouth over me.”

‭‭Psalm‬ ‭69:13-15‬ ‭NIV‬‬

“Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves receive from God.”

‭‭2 Corinthians‬ ‭1:3-4‬ ‭NIV‬‬

• To all that are struggling with depression,

• I don’t know you. I don’t know who you are or where you’re from. I don’t know your background, nor do I know your unique circumstances. I don’t know if your depression is the result of your genetic disposition, or if it is caused by something terrible that happened to you in your past. I don’t know if you’re going through a major change in your life or if you’re struggling to cope with the loss of a loved one.
• There are a lot of things about your fight with depression that I simply don’t know.
• But let me tell you a few things that I do know.
• I know how it feels.
• I know how it feels to have no one understand what you’re going through.
• I know how it feels to feel alone in a crowded room; to feel like you’re putting on a “happy mask” in public, only to feel like you’re slipping further and further into an unsolvable despair.
• I know how it feels to lose interest in things that once brought you joy and happiness; for foods to lose their taste, for nature to lose its beauty and for the world to lose its color.
• I know how it feels to want to be left alone while simultaneously (and desperately) yearning for someone to reach out and help you.
• I know how it feels to do everything — absolutely everything— to try to fill the growing emptiness inside of you. I know how it feels to try to self-medicate and mute the pain with anything and everything: excessive sleep, television, foods, pain killers or other addictions.
• I know how it feels to fall to your knees and beg God to free you from the terrible loneliness of the darkness in your mind — only to feel like the ground has opened beneath you, plunging you into an even darker abyss.
• I know how it feels because I’ve suffered from depression since I was a kid. In 2006, my depression culminated in a suicide attempt that very nearly claimed my life.
• I know how depression feels and I’m intimately aware of the thoughts and feelings that lead to suicide.
• But I also know a few other things. And this is why I’m writing to you.

• I know there is hope

• Just as night is defeated by the dawn, or as the winter is conquered by the spring, or as the darkness is dominated by any degree of light, I know that you can make it through this.

• And what’s more, I know that you can be a better person because of it.
• Our lives are a journey on the earth. As we move forward, we will not only figuratively experience the geography of life: the exhilaration of high mountains, the tranquility of calm meadows, the isolation of treacherous canyons, but we also experience the seasons of life: the hope of spring, the abundance of summer, the harvest of autumn and, yes, the darkness and depression of winter.
• Just as we continuously experience the change in seasons, we will also experience the contrast between canyons and mountains many times in our lives. Some winters and canyons last longer than others, it is true. But as someone who frequently struggles with depression, I can promise you that the springs do come and that there are paths out of the canyons and into the light.
• I said that you are going to be a better person as a result of your depression. I meant it. Having dealt with depression for over 20 years, I can say with confidence that my depression has given me an incomparable appreciation for life.
• If you move forward while holding onto the knowledge that the sun will rise in your soul, I assure you that one day, you will stand at the summit of a figurative mountain and look back on your life’s journey. You will see your canyons of depression for what they were and realize that they taught you things you otherwise couldn’t have learned. And, to your utter amazement, you will see how your experiences with depression, dark and painful as they were, only added to the overall beauty of your life.
• For aren’t the most beautiful vistas the ones that are filled with mountains, valleys, canyons and wondrous variety?
• To all who are struggling with depression or suicidal thoughts: you are not alone. We are all on this journey together. I promise you that there is hope. Let us reach out to one another and walk together in the sunlight.

This article was originally published on Seth Adam Smith’s blog SethAdamSmith.com 

On this date July 12 every year for 18 years we celebrated your birthday. Now we celebrate your death anniversary. Our hearts ache with the worst pain ever. Your memory is all we have to hang on to. We will forever love and miss you. 
Today I wish I did so many things differently. 

I wish I held you a little longer. Wish I kept you when you had to go away. 

I wish I could erase time and start all over. But I’m too late. 😒🖤💔 

I know. I have very strong faith. You are in a better place. Happy. Smiling. And enjoying every minute of it. 

And my faith and hope is that One day we will meet again.  

I love you!!! My beloved Niece. Jocelyn. 🖤💔💙 

Happy 19th Birthday. July 12, 2017 

Happy Father’s Day !!!

Good fathers are needed. They are vitally important to the happiness and success of every family. There are many reasons why fathers are important, here are five truths that stand out to me.

1. Fathers are the knight in every daughter’s fairy tale and the hero in every son’s comic book.

2. Fathers are the greatest example when they think no one’s looking

3. A father’s counsel can live on forever

4. A father’s perspective fulfills every child’s need for exploration and adventure

5. Fathers are an earthly reflection of God

Every child is in need of a good father, one who will take the time to know his child and love him. William Shakespeare wrote, “Wise is the father that knows his own child.” When a father walks with his child each step of the way, not only does he learn to know his child, but he develops an unbreakable bond of love and friendship and he leaves valuable lessons etched on his child’s heart. There is no greater gift for a father in this life.

My Middle child graduated High School and  I’m so proud of him.

I’m so proud of all 3 .. Love my kids ❤